I am writing this piece in route to Sri Lanka with my heart full of dreams and my head full of doubt. Not quite two years ago, we started blogging and now we have quit our jobs, vacated our house, disposed all our possessions, and are heading to Asia. You might think you have heard this tale repeated as a mantra by Millennials everywhere, but this isn’t that kind of story. Instead of fleeing corporate America, we are doubling down with a purpose.
Our worldly goods weren’t liquidated to fund the trip. In fact, we are just visiting Sri Lanka. All of our stuff is packed neatly in a moving truck as part of my corporate relocation package to Orlando Florida. True, I am in the final days of my 20 year career, but I am starting with a new company, in a more prestigious full time position with the full knowledge of what this means – I am re-buying into the system, but what has changed?
For years I felt betrayed by the professional promise of, not only making money but having free money to fund my lifestyle. Between the demands of children, my crazy ex wife, and keeping up with the Joneses, it felt like there was never any cheese left for me. I kept working harder and harder, with less and less freedom and only a fleeting feeling of financial security. Money should be an enabler, but like fire, it needs to be handled with care or it can burn you. Why was I feeling so burned?
Related Link: Thrombosis: the trip that almost wasn’t- Ed’s story of cooperate burnout and escaping to Thailand.
The siren song of success is more than money. It is earning respect too. Tim Ferriss’ (4 hour work week) warnings about work for work’s sake resonated with me to the very center of my soul. I don’t want to form my identity from work, but I don’t want to be damned for working either. I don’t want to be damned by cynics, who call me a sellout or skeptics who lost the faith. Worse yet, I don’t want to be condemned in my own home. At its core, working is providing for your family and should be celebrated today as much as hunters returning with a fresh kill to cook on the fire. Anything less is pathological.
I am renewing my faith in my production, and my house to shelter, and my family’s ability to nourish in every way possible. I trust my second wife, Jenn, to nurture and protect our mutual interest. To use the fruits of my labor for the good of our little tribe. We aren’t abandoning the digital dream. Far from it. Coleman Concierge has its first full time employee with Jenn now able to fully commit to the business. Our dream is now funded, staffed, and poised for success.
Related Link: Dream Maintenance, the art of letting go- The Pareto Principle applied to dreaming.
We took off from LAX, not running from a nightmare but pursuing a dream. If you have ever flown west into the setting sun, you might have noticed a strange phenomenon. The sunset lasts forever. Instead of a flash of brilliance, it’s just a burning ember that refuses to go out. Then comes the longest night you can imagine. The jet’s engines just aren’t fast enough to recapture the lost day so you just plow forward into a never ending darkness.
There comes a time when you have to reset your clocks. As we finally rested in East Asia, a new day broke. Not only in the strange land around us, but in our hearts as well. The trick will be to take this energy home, and not end up chasing the remains of the day into a long dark night.
Not everybody around us shared our dreams and view of the world. Our family in California was more than a little apprehensive. Even though flying to our new home in Orlando takes the same time and money as driving to San Diego from Northern California, we were leaving their cognitive map. A cognitive map is beautiful and dangerous at the same time. You can cloak your world in memories of familiar places and safe passages. The very act of nostalgia floods your system with euphoria, but this is not the euphoria we are seeking.
Our little tribe of Coleman Concierge is based on wanderlust, which flies in the face of nostalgia. Instead of remembering the same and familiar, we are actively seeking the unique and different. With all things, however, you need balance and we are so far from being balanced. With any luck, we’ll soon find the balance we desperately need.
Related Link: Jumping in with both feet- Jenn’s and Ed’s love story.
Our first stop on the road to balance is the Mahagedara Retreat, an Ayurvedic wellness center deep in the jungles of Sri Lanka. The simple translation of Ayurvedic is the knowledge of life. Practitioners believe that people have a core constitution that is a combination of three primary doshas – Vata, Pitta, and Kappa. One achieves their optimal health for balancing these elements inside of themselves. We are hoping that thousands of years of wisdom from the far corner of the globe is exactly what we will need to jump start our journey. Of course, publishing a kick ass massive Sri Lanka travel guide wouldn’t hurt the cause 😉
Much like the balance between corporate American climber and digital nomad, Ayurveda teaching seeks to stabilize the competing energies in your spirit and unify the chi within you. Vatta is the element of air. It is critical for movement and creativity, but an excess can cause anxiety. Kappa is the element of earth. It is essential for compassion, but an excess can cause a resistance to change. Pitta is the element of fire. It spurs change, but an excess can cause anger. Everything is medicine and everything is poison at the same time. The key is to find balance. I can see these doshas playing through our new professional life and our future digital dreams.
Related Link: Finding Zen with Zion Guru- Overcoming your fears on the top of a 200′ rappel.
It would be rash to believe that a few weeks in the jungle can instantly change our lives, but, like a butterfly flapping its wings in China, it can start a series of events that forever shape us. If nothing else, it fits our current paradox, of embracing corporate life to build our vehicle for travel, exploration, and freedom. If we remember to seek balance and not just simple novelty; to respect our personal constitution and the character of our tribe, then we just might have a chance to find true happiness in this crazy world of ours.
I’m so happy that you managed to escape the rat-race! But honestly, I got worried at first when I saw the word homeless! Keep living your truth and remember to keep us updated! By the way, that second sunset you posted is breathtaking!!!
I haven’t escaped yet but we are definitely working the plan and living our truth. Glad we could bring you along on the journey. The second sunset was at Sunset Cliffs in San Diego. It was a high seas days and that was a long exposure shot right after the sun set. The longer wavelength purples travel over the horizon better so the pictures are purple. (as opposed to the short wavelength reds that penetrate the direct line of sight better and color the skies orange with the setting sun)
It really takes so much courage to quit your job and sold off everything you have, just to pursue your dream. For that, I solute to you! Asia is beautiful and I wish to explore Sri Lanka soon!
There is a courage to bravado, self confidence, and easy answers. I also think there is also courage in signing up for something that you know isn’t going to be easy. Knowing that everyday you are going to be putting in work and you are really working on building something substantial. Towards this end, I feel courageous for my perseverance in the office so the collective team at Coleman Concierge can achieve our goals.
I am actually a deep nerd physicist / engineering type doing some kind of rocket science stuff. I am pretty good at it and have been doing it for 20 years or so. I am switching companies but looking to pursue my professional goals aggressively instead of looking for the escape route. hoping that it gives me some satisfaction to be able to pursue hard projects instead of waiting with one foot out of the door. Nothing with work about travel per se but there is more to the equation.
Jenn and I have always split our duties on the blog. I am the primary writer and regularly read and comment on industry blogs. Jenn is the photographer, social media influencer and works really hard on all aspects of the blog as a business with sales, brand interactions, trip planning and so many other innumerable actions. All of this work was really hard for us to balance with her working as a concierge and spa therapist. The new balance comes from our collective time being freed up. I am looking forward to both a healthy lifestyle, rewarding work, and frequent travel that Jenn arranges.
Thank you. We are looking forward to the adventure. You can never plan for every eventuality but a little organization and foresight does go a long way. I think the key is to stay mentally agile and not get trapped by your plans and expectations.
fingers crossed because this butterfly is flapping.
Thank you for all of the positive energy.
Thank you. We have been craving more inner harmony and things are looking really great right now.
Are aren’t ditching the shackles yet but it is invigorating taking positive actions and steps to get there. I think the only way you can have the life you have always dreamed of is to never give up dreaming. As simple as it sounds, the dreams are the real secret sauce. If you can hold onto your dreams, everything is possible.
What an exciting and bold move. I met your lovely wife at Bloghouse this year in indy! What a lovely person- heart and soul- and so interesting. 😉 I wish you all the luck in the world finding out what works best for the two of you. Safe travels!
She has nothing but great things to say about you two. Since we are almost neighbors now I can’t wait to meet you in person.
Hey Ed & Jenn,
I still remember when i met you in Huntsville and you were planning to quit your job. Great job guys! It’s a beautiful feeling to follow your dreams. Being homeless in Sri Lanka is not a bad deal. It’s such a pretty country to explore. All the best for your wanderlust. Hope our paths cross soon.
Huntsville was a blast. If you remember our musings there we were both looking to pull the rip cord. Now, we have a more resource intense escape plan. Either way, the dream remains. If you ever desire to come to Florida give us a holler. We would love to see you again.
Such a beautiful and honest post and one that really speaks of intense introspection, something we all can do with. I wish you all the best on this new phase in life and of course loads of adventures. Also, a wellness retreat is the perfect way to start a journey so important. Cheers!
Thank you my friend. I hope the lessons of wellness get embedded deep into our souls. We can certainly use that wisdom in our life.
Finding balance is such an important part of life as we often get pulled in so many directions. Congrats on the move and this next phase of your life! I look forward to reading more about your adventures. 🙂
Thank you. We are excited for the adventures ahead.
I hope you finally achieve what you are in quest for. Leaving home miles away and staying in new surroundings can be challenging. I am really impressed how well you have explained the 3 elements of Ayurveda. I wish you a great stay in Asia!
Truth be told, I back wrote that part after the Ayurveda doctor consultation and a week at the retreat:). Glad I got it right and learned something.
I recently ‘reset my clock’. I had to make a career change. It was hard but such a ‘life saver’ for me.
Sounds like we are in the same boat. Hopefully it works out well for us. Lifesaver is a great feeling.
Thank you for an amazing comment. It is so personally rewarding when I feel like somebody gets my writing. Good luck to you are your quest for balance. If our paths ever cross, it would be great to meet in person.
What a beautiful way to sum up Sri Lanka and very apropos.
I’m considering taking a new role with the same company, but in a different country. So very similar to the transition your family is beginning. It’s both terrifying and exciting to think about, so it was so reassuring to read about your perspective and hopes for this new phase of your life. Best of luck and can’t wait to hear more about how it goes!
Changing countries would be intense, even if you are staying with your same company. I could see us doing that at some point in the future. Exciting and terrifying comes in waves. Sometimes they alternate and sometimes they happen at the same time. I am so lucky that Jenn and I are doing this together. She handles almost all of minutia of our life (and blog).
The move can be scary, yet exciting! I am so happy for you on the new changes! I’m sure 2018 will be a year filled with fun adventures and successes! Also, I can’t wait to hear about your stories in Sri Lanka.
The Sri Lanka stories are coming. I spent most of Christmas Holiday working on them so we have a lot of content that should be ready to roll even during our move. (Only two more left, leaving temporary housing to go to an Air B&B for a couple of weeks and then finally moving into our place)
Dreams can be very personal. As I grow as a person, I strive to see everybody’s desires from their perspective and not mine. Even with my kids, I want to respect their personality while still “parenting”. In the end, I just want them to not make decisions from a negative place. I don’t want them to be guided by fear, anger or hurt. I want them to choose joy and live a joy based life. I figure good things will follow those energies.
That was one huge step you took to move far away from home. I wish you the best of luck for your new journey. Hopefully you will find happiness in Sri Lanka and 2018 will be a great year for you. Happy New Year!
Looking forward to an exciting 2018. Happy New Year to you as well.
Moving to another city in the same country itself could be quite a tiring activity, relocating to another country …. I always the worst bad habit of humans (if you can call it that ) is trying to keep up with Joneses. Happy New Year and Good Luck for your new life!
Agreed with keeping up with the Joneses. You will never be happy if you let other people dictate the conditions for your success.
It sounds like a scary but exciting time for you! Sri Lanka looks like a beautiful place to visit and live and it’s high on my bucket list!
I think I would like visiting Sri Lanka better than living there. It’s a beautiful country but very different from my cognitive map in America. I was happy heading home again and starting my new life.
This is beautifully written, wow! It brought me right back to soaring through the clouds into the sunset when I was flying to Bangkok. That night doesn’t ever end! Keep on keeping on what you’re doing, you’ll continue to surprise yourself, have a positive affect on people, and make a change in the world, Thanks for an amazing read!
Wow, thanks for an amazing comment. I really appreciate it.
So your new company has moved your family to Sri Lanka? That can be exiting and scary. We originally moved to Europe – Italy, specifically – for my husband’s job. I had dreamed of living in Italy, though what we got with the move didn’t end up being anything like what I had pictured when I dreamed of living in Italy. It was a hard and lonely seven years we spent in a tiny, sort of rural village of Italy but it opened up a lot of travel opportunities for us. We also started our own blog when we moved, which ended up becoming my own full time job years later. Best of luck to y’all!
I actually switched jobs and moved to Orlando Florida by way of Sri Lanka. For a brief moment, we were absolutely free and drifting around the word. That energy, plus the rush from changing your entire life around swirled around together. I tried to capture that feeling so it wouldn’t escape forever.
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I am still curious about taking a position in Europe. I could imagine it happening, most likely in England. Hopefully it will not be seven years of loneliness for either of us. I think we are set in Orlando for the foreseeable future (which is 3-5 years). There are a lot of good travel opportunities here. It’s just different from Italy (or London).
So well written, Ed, and I love how you honored your relationship with Jen while describing your transition to the next phase in life. So much love for you two! xox
We love you too. Glad you came over to check it out. Thank you for the kind words.
Finding a balance is always an ongoing mission. I hope that your time in Sri Lanka helps. The next few months will definitely have its scary moments, but also exciting ones, and that’s all part of the adventure.
On the bright side, we get to try swimming with manatees that we talked about in Alabama. As soon as it’s not so dang cold in Florida… I thought it was supposed to be warm here.
Sounds like a perfect plan! San Diego will miss you but you’ll be back or we’ll cross tracks eventually. It’s a tickle that you are in Sri Lanka diving into Ayurveda. Two things/places I love. Wishing you so much success, stability and happiness.
We’ll miss you too but it’s a small world. We will see each other again I’m sure.
So well written. Leaving your home miles away and moving to another country sounds quite tiring to me but yes eveything happens for a reason. Sri Lanka is beautiful and hope you will achieve what you are looking for. Sunsets are just amazing and they act as a hope for new day. So, wish 2018 brings lots of happiness and success for you.
That you. We are actually coming back to live on the other side of America but it is still quite an adventure. I hope 2018 is everything you are hoping for was well.
This is beautiful! Yes, the one who provides for the family is no less than the hunter who defeats a wild animal to feed the family. Glad to know things are working out well now. Best wishes for your digital firm as well as travel passions!
Loved reading this post. Initially I too was fooled into thinking that you have sold everything to start life afresh in Sri Lanka. But as I read further realized what exactly you meant. It is great that you are able to balance your dreams along with your corporate stint. It is so easy to forget and forego ones dreams when you are in the throes of the corporate rat race. I am sure you are having a great and rejuvenating time in Sri Lanka.
We were receiving a lot of comments about congrats on moving to Sri Lanka so I went back and tried to clear it up with opening verbiage. Working for works sake, be it cooperate America or subsistence farming can be seriously not fun. What makes it all worth while is that my (Ed) work enables Jenn to run the blog full time. Working to support the family goal has been keeping things balanced and focused so far.